Traces

time is getting on. am starting to get used to working life, no matter how much i abhor it. alright i dont hate it, just feel wistful about not being able to do a job that i may possibly like better. it's routine life which i hate. i dont like the feeling of being... unfulfilled. in school, i used to go home real late, exhausted, and dreaded the amount of homework which i never really got around to doing. but those times were fulfilling. i go home each day thinking about the people i saw in school, the things i did or didnt do, etc etc. school was a beautiful place. now i get home in the evenings relieved that the day is finally over. i haven't been analysing why im miserable at work, other than pay and duty issues, but now i know why.

i think i just feel lonely.

it's not that i haven't made friends, but i couldnt possible make any close friends there at all... they're all of a different generation, only one person in the whole workplace is unmarried and she's 27, the rest are wedded with children and has family responsibilities. being the maknae(meaning the youngest one in korean) sounds good and is good at times because all the adults take care of you, but other times... i just feel lonely. it's probably the main source of my discontent. afterall, what's impt is not what you do, but the company that you have. i miss my friends.

well work aside, life is alright, started dance classes! am looking forward to saturdays with wanswen at cj, learning snsd dances for 2 months! ahh happiness.

and yeah, i guess many people should know now, that i put up videos of my dances onto youtube. took me lotsa courage to overcome the fear of rejection, and being teased by friends who might find this action ridiculous. but i guess if it's something i really like to do, i shouldnt be afraid to do it and not let other people deter me from doing it. much less ppl who just watch you to ridicule you. but i am still a coward for i put it up onto youtube instead of facebook for direct scrutiny of my friends.

didnt expect anything in return but earning two suscribers and a few appreciation msgs in my inbox really made my day and made my venture worthwhile. thanks to whoever you people are :)

since young i've loved acting singing and dancing.. i dont know if it is apparent to people who know me, but i've never really expressed verbally about them. with the exception of singing :D looking back at what i've done, i realised it was pretty obvious after all. chinese theatre in sec sch, tsd in jc, speech/public speaking competitions. singing competitions, mass dance ic... haha. i still dont know where the fear of letting people know i like to perform comes from. sigh.

enough frowns for the night.. am bound to have monday blues tmr.

Clovergreen♥

There's more to things
than you'll ever know,
but I'm beginning to anticipate the unknown.

Smile,
because you are worth it.

Tey Xiao Wei
08021991
NUS FASS
Victoria Junior College
CHIJ SN

Aquarius Enthusiast
Extreme 蘇打綠 Sodafan

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